Church of England

When you have set the date for your wedding you need to make an appointment to see the vicar of the church you intend to marry in. Church of England Clergy are authorised registras so there is no need to give notice at the Register Office.

Banns are read in each parish on three Sundays before the wedding to announce your intention to marry. Once your banns have been read your wedding can take place on any day within the following three months.

Free Church

If you are marrying in Methodist, Baptist or United Reform churches you will require an appropriate certificate or licence from the Register Office.

If the minister is not authorised by the registrar to solemnise marriages a charge will be made for the registrar to attend.

Roman Catholic

Catholic priests are authorised to solemnise marriages, but a certificate or licence must be obtained from the Register Office. To marry in a Catholic church at least one partner must have been baptised in the Catholic faith. Catholics who wish to marry in a non - Catholic church should request permission from their priest.

Other Religious Denominations

Marriages which are conducted according to the rite of other religions require a notice of marriage to be given to the registrar for the area in order for him to grant a licence.

Civil Ceremonies

There are no residence restrictions for civil marriages so you can marry at the Register Office of your choice. However, you need to register your intention to marry at your local Register Office if you are having the ceremony outside the area where you live.

Weddings Abroad

Make sure that you check the full legalities of the marriage with your travel agent or the consulate of the country in which you are to be married.

Marriages solemnised abroad in accordance with the laws of a foreign country, cannot be registered in the United Kingdom.

Your travel agent or tour operator will inform you of which documents you require. In most cases you will need your birth certificate and a valid ten year passport.

INVITATIONS

Order invitations four months before the wedding and ask for a proof to check prior to printing to make sure all the details are correct.

Invitations should be sent out ten weeks before the wedding by the brides parents. Complications arise in the case of divorced parents or if the bride and groom are hosting the reception themselves, but the wording can be adapted to suit the circumstances.

So that your guests know what to expect, state whether it is a lunch, dinner or buffet reception. If evening dress is required the words ‘Black Tie’ should appear at the bottom right hand corner. Include a stamped addressed reply card.

Send out one invitation per family. It may be a good idea to order  extra invitations to allow for any mistakes in writing or for last minute guests.

A guide to wording your invitations is set out below :
                                

When choosing flowers take along a swatch of fabric to help with your choice of colour. It is important to take into account your height and stature, as nothing looks worse than a petite bride with a huge, oversized trailing bouquet, or a tiny posy carried by a tall bride.

The brides bouquet sets the theme for her attendants flowers. Adult bridesmaids usually carry a smaller version of the brides bouquet while child bridesmaids or flower girls should be given flowers that are light and easy to hold. Buttonholes and corsages should also coordinate with the brides bouquet.

Save money by choosing flowers in season or opting for a simple arrangement.

Cornflowers represent hope, Carnations - pure deep love,  Lily of the valley - happiness, Roses - love, Orange blossom - chastity.

Flowers can be incorporated into headdresses. Small delicate flowers look best.

Carnations are the most popular choice for buttonholes.

It is a nice idea to give corsages to the bride and groom’s mothers, but check on their outfits for colour matching.

Flower arrangements set off the tables at the reception. Try to include colours to match the brides bouquet. A nice effect can be obtained by including candles in the arrangement.

When choosing the brides ring it may be a good idea to make sure that it goes with the engagement ring. You can choose a design with a plain or patterned bevelled edge.

Gold is a soft metal, alloyed with other metals for use in rings. White gold is a light coloured gold alloyed with silver. Platinum is a hard wearing silver coloured metal.

The word ‘carat’ refers to the purity of the gold.
Eighteen carat gold is purer than nine carat but wears less well.

The bridegroom may also have a ring bought for him by the bride depending on personal choice.

PHOTOGRAPHY

With the majority of weddings taking place on the thirty Saturdays between April and October it makes sense to book your photographer as soon as you set a date for your wedding.

Make an appointment with your photographer and discuss what aspects of your wedding you want photographing. You may want some in black and white or sepia as well as colour.  In addition to photographs for your album you may like some informal, reportage style shots. A good photographer should be able to take your ideas and incorporate them into his / her photography.

Do make sure that the photographer is aware of your requirements at the initial meeting otherwise the cost may be more than you anticipated.

Most photographers have a selection of packages to suite individual budgets, and once you have decided on one, get a written quotation.

DON’T skimp on your photography. Your wedding day goes by so fast – and after it’s over, all you’ll have left is your memories and your  PICTURES.
 

VIDEO

Much the same applies when booking your videographer as does with choosing a photographer.

Ask to see a demonstration video before booking, as this will tell you a lot about their work and type of shots, special effects etc.

TRANSPORT

Book your transport around nine months prior to the wedding to make sure that you get exactly what you want.

The bridal party will probably need to hire two cars, one to take the bride and her father, and one for her mother and the bridesmaids.

Limousines are popular because they can accomodate wide or long trains.

THE CAKE

The wedding cake is the focal point of the reception and should be ordered four to six months before the wedding.

Traditionally it is a fruit cake, but sponge, madeira or rich chocolate cakes are just as popular today, and tiers can be mixed.

The choice of the right wine should be dictated by what is on the menu.

Guests are usually offered a drink on arrival, either Champagne or Bucks fizz.

Champagne or sparkling wine is used for the toast. The ideal temperature for Champagne is 42 - 48 degrees fahrenheit. It should be drunk from slender flutes or tulip shaped glasses. Pour about an inch into each glass and then half fill.

There are always some people who do not want alcohol and some people who have to drive home ! So offer a choice of non alcoholic wines, and fruit juices.

THE BEST MAN

Duties

Arranges the stag night and ensures that the groom arrives home safely afterwards.

Ensures that the ushers know their duties.

Takes Order of Service sheets and buttonholes to the church.

Drives the groom to the wedding.

Takes control of the rings and hands them to the minister during the service.

Reads cards and messages at the reception.
 

CHIEF BRIDESMAID

Duties

Assists the bride and helps her to dress on the day.

Assembles the bridesmaids and looks after the small attendants before the ceremony.

Arranges the brides dress and veil before she walks up the aisle.

Takes care of the brides bouquet when she reaches the chancel steps and during the signing of the register.
 

THE BRIDES FATHER

Travels with the bride to the church.

Takes the brides right hand to give to the minister at the appropriate time.

Makes the first speech and proposes the first toast to the happiness of the bride and groom.

MARRIAGE AND THE LAW

Notice of marriage

Before you can marry in a register office, approved premise, church or chapel in England or Wales (other than a Church of England where you may have banns called), you must give notice of your intention to marry.

From January 1st 2001 each person wanting to marry has to give their own notice of intention to marry to the Superintendent Registrar in the district in which they reside. Both parties must have resided in a district in England or Wales for at least seven whole days immediately prior to giving a Notice of Marriage.

This notice will then be displayed on the public notice board for 15 days, after which, provided all documentation has been received and cleared, an authority for your marriage to proceed will be issued.

If you live in a different district to where the marriage will take place, you will need to apply for and obtain the authority for your marriage to take place. This authority must be delivered to the Minister of the church or Superintendent Registrar of the district where you are to marry.

You will still be able to marry in any register office or approved premise in England or Wales irrespective of where you live, and your notice can still be taken up to one year in advance of the date of your wedding.

Proof of identity

When you give notice of your marriage, you need to give proof of your identity and the identity of the person you are marrying.

Passports are an ideal way of proving your identity. If you have never held a passport or your passport is not available for some reason, another proof of your identity will be required.

Documents for divorced or widowed partners

If either of you has been married before, either in this country or abroad, you will need to show proof of your divorce.

If either of you was divorced in England or Wales, you will need to provide a court stamped copy of the decree absolute (the final divorce paper).

If the divorce took place in a foreign country, you will need to show  the original document issued by that country and an English translation, if the document is in a foreign language. If no documents were issued in the foreign country, you will be told what can be accepted as proof of divorce.

If either of you is a widow or widower, you will need to provide a certified copy of your partner's death registration and in certain cases a copy of the marriage certificate as well.

Proof of prior marriage in a foreign country

If you have married each other in a foreign country, you only need to get married here if you think the marriage was not legal. If you decide to get married here, you will need to provide any documents  issued by that country when you give notice of your marriage.

Parental permission for partners under 18

If either of you is under 18, you will need to provide proof that your parents or guardian agree to the marriage.

If your parents are divorced, you may also be asked to provide  the court order that gives custody to one of them. The Superintendent Registrar will give you advice on this matter.

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